I’ve been deeply grateful for the past days. I just have these profound feelings of thankfulness travel though me. When I ponder upon them, some of their origin may be of my trip visiting my family and long-time friends. Especially the fact that I was able to connect with my siblings, a dear sister and a brother that have both chosen to remain in our native Finland, educed utter sentiment of reconnection to something that I feared having lost. A true contact and a connection with these dear beings I once used to share a dwelling with – and then chose to alienate myself from by following my heart’s longing to faraway destinations.
The fact that we were able to sit around, have dinner and just chat was a true gemstone and exactly what I needed. There we were getting to know our adult selves. On the journey of accepting that time has done it’s work, and that we’ve changed, yet share a special connection, an eternal bond.
What’s difficult about living abroad is having to relinquish these everyday casual encounters. Whenever you manage to get together, it is a big deal and on big deal occasions you talk about big deal issues, the ones that tend to be rather far from real matters that occupy your thoughts. This is and will be the ever present challenge, and I’m ready to battle it. The fact that I feel my brother and sister approving my current lifestyle and decisions give me power. I don’t need their blessing and yet family is everything to me.
Family is a large conception though, and through medias like this blog, I have also been able to enlarge my extended family. Keeping the old flames alive and bringing about new ones – that’s what I have set my heart on.
In the company of this good old hymn, full of wisdom, I leave you on this snowy Paris early eve. Keep yourselves and your souls – as well as the ones around you – warm.
“I’m sometimes up and sometimes down,
Coming for to carry me home,
But still my soul feels heavenly bound,
Coming for to carry me home. “
![So[phis]tix](http://www.makinen.fr/susa/wordpress/wp-content/susu_img/sophistix.gif)
February 11, 2009 at 8:06 AM -
i’m so glad you had a wonderful trip and had the chance to connect again with family and friends. such connections are a true gift! and going home is always a sweet reminder of where we’ve been, where we are, as well as inspiring new dreams of where we would like to go…
February 11, 2009 at 3:17 PM -
Audrey – Yep, spending time with loved-ones makes you stronger. It gives you a sturdy base, and then you can fly off to the big world again and feel like you’re coming from somewhere.
February 15, 2009 at 12:45 AM -
Yay!! Glad you had such a great time! It will be nice to see you and catch up… are you on winter break right now? We’ll be back sometime on Tuesday… We’ll catch up then…. Hugs, Leesa
February 16, 2009 at 3:51 PM -
Leesa – No breaks for me… well, with the fresh memories of my January trip in mind, I’ll survive. What do you say about skating at Montparnasse on Sun March 1? Oh, and I went to see the chick movie you and Dawn saw, and it was just “what the doctor prescribed”;)